Pimpcron doesn’t want you trash your templates!
Hi people (and non-people)! Tis I, The People’s Pimpcron, and I have some neat ideas for your templates! So set out your craft glue, pipe cleaners, and glitter then roll up your sleeves and have some fun!
Has the death of your 40k templates got ya down? Don’t just throw them in the bin, or toss them in the waste basket, or drop them in the rubbage pale. Be green and find new uses for them!
This is an obvious one, but a good one non-the-less! Be sure to tape over the hole in the middle so that it doesn’t undermine the point of a coaster.
Do you struggle with excessive weight gain? Have trouble sleeping? Or suffer from a techno-organic virus? Well, this wonder product will solve at least one of those problems! This amazing craft project reduces the amount of food you can push into your gullet. No more burgers for you, my overweight pal.
Dog Knight Costume
Oh man, we’ve all been there. Halloween is coming up and you just can’t find the right props to finish your puppy’s Halloween costume before the big dance. Well look no further than your templates! This little dude goes from Sir Dingus McDillweed to Lord Lady Killer in no time! Look how happy a new sword and shield made this little guy.
Nowadays, these kids are wearing those stupid looking black-rimmed glasses with the neon colored arms that people wore in the 80’s. Step out on your own and turn your fashion up a notch with these awesome, hip, tubular, cool, amazing, incredible, neato, bitchin’, amaze-balls sunglasses! I’ll admit that they don’t darken anything really, and I would advise against driving with these things.
Ladies, do you have a hot date but can’t find the right earrings to match your outfit? Well anyone from Martha Stewart to MC Hammer (the only two fashion people I know) will tell you that lime green goes with everything! Grab a couple templates and turn nerd heads all night with these striking earrings.
I’ve been using mine like this for years, do you even know how much I save annually on buying paper plates? Like a whopping $12.50. That’s money in the bank right there.
The local place here in town often forgets to cut our pizza completely. And while my friends moan and cry that the pieces aren’t separate, I grab my cutter! This handy device quickly bludgeons your pizza into cutting with its state of the art flat, blunt edge.
This is a picture of my car using my nifty spare tire made of a template. Sure, it is a little small, and it makes my undercarriage rub, and it causes a lot of damage to the bottom of my truck, and my real spare tire is probably a better option. But this is a list of uses for these templates, I never said they were good uses.
Fool your friends and be the life of any party with this awesome giant snot bubble! Gross out your babysitter, teacher, or stuffy Science teacher. They’ll be all like, “Get that out of your nose, I know it’s not real.” And you’ll be all like, “I got you! I so got you! Hahahahahaha!”
What Large Blast Template Plate is complete without the Flamer Spoon? It’s just like a real spoon, except without that dumb indent to hold liquid. Who eats foods that are wet? Gross.
Anime Nervous Sweat Drop
Looking for that final touch for your anime cosplay? Look no further than painting your flame template blue and making a stupid expression to really capture whatever dumb character you are portraying.
It was either that or Prison Shiv, but I don’t think many readers are currently in prison due to prisons not approving of my sassy anti-establishment attitude. Down with the system! Or was it “system of a down”? Or “down with the sickness”? No, I think it was “sugar we’re going down”. Yeah, that one feels right. It’s been a while since I’ve been an edgy teen. So to all of you readers who choose to smuggle in my articles instead of porn or cigarettes, “Sugar we’re going down!” Solid.
Any other useful ideas for templates?