40K: New Rulebook Lore Shockers

8th Edition is here, the Imperium is broken and full of shocking news like this:

We’re thumbing through the new rulebook to pick out the biggest news in there to shake up the Imperium.  Here’s what we’ve found.

The Cicitrix Maledictum tore the Imperium apart, and trouble came with it – as the Imperium had not seen in 10,000 years.

The Astronomican flickered and went dark – in an instant replacing the Imperium of Man with millions of isolated worlds, each alone in the dark.

Khorne sent 88 Daemon Legions to assault the Imperial Palace

The Legion of the Damned have appeared on hundreds of worlds, throwing back the forces of Chaos wherever they stand.

The Astronomican flared back into blazing glory, onto to illuminate an Imperium of horror – over half the Astartes Chapters are missing, with a dozen confirmed destroyed during the darkness.

On Armageddon, the tide of daemons was so strong, that Orks and Humans fought as one to simply survive.

Baal is overrun with hundreds of Tyranid splinter fleets. The Blood Angels recall all their successor chapter to aid the homeworld, all who come losing their Chapter Masters during the fight. As all is thought lost and Commander Dante prepares to die fighting, Guilliman arrives to break the last Tyranid forces – with possible aid from the daemonic forces of Khorne!

Mortarion and the Death Guard lead a crusade upon Ultramar only to grind to a halt at the hands of Guilliman. The two brothers faced each other in combat before the chaos forces withdrew.

One stable passage through the Cicitrix Maledictum has been discovered – the Nachmund system. Home to a lost Household of Fallen Knights, and their Chaos Marine allies and fleets. Only the foolhardy of the Imperium dare to try to run the passage.

Finally there is this regarding the events within the Imperial Palace.  Break out your magnifying glasses and tell me what you think it means.

 

 

~ Get ready for 8th Edition. The Imperium is changed.

  • Gullinbursti

    Well even for a pleb like me the last line is obviously “the Master of Mankind dead.” Wonder if this means emp will finally get reincarnated or if he’s just dead dead.

    • Ryan Williams

      ‘Obviously’

      Or not.

    • petrow84

      Well, for a Scrabble pled, like me, te last line is “the Master of Mankind… dead? lead? deed? bead?

      • euansmith

        Is it on a Triple Word Score?

        • petrow84

          Triple letter! Sadly, only for the “e”…

    • Randy Randalman

      It says, “…those who would see the Master of Mankind dead.”

      • stinkoman

        This. You can make out “those who..” on the line before it.

    • TheWanderingJewels

      Current meta (Dark Millennium novel) indicated while Emps is not quite dead, he effectively is. Also Roboute found out exactly how Emps thought of him and his brothers (Tools fora job. and nothing more)

    • Anggul

      It could say a lot of things.

      It could be the someone believes he is dead, or wishes to see him dead, or a number of other things. It’s obviously meant to scare-monger.

  • I imagine it says something like “…those who would like to see the Master of Mankind dead.” I think this little teaser isn’t as a big a thing as some make out. Even in the highly unlikely event that they kill of the big-E I suspect he’d make a comeback, even if it is in a Sigmar sense.

    Maybe GW should a caption competition. 😀

    I guess with the marines so broken they’d be more likely to accept the primaris and get upgraded.

    • Darth Bumbles

      Maybe even … “which bodes ill to those who’s would see the Master of Mankind dead”.

    • Rafał Pytlak

      Yeah, but they provided a nice tease with the astronomican going out for a time…

    • GameOgre

      Hasn’t lots of the lore so far been that when the Emperor dies he ascends to god-hood?
      It was the subject of a story where one chaos god was close to succeeding but another screwed up their plans because they don’t want to see the Emperor ascend?

      • Trey

        That was the view in Eye of Terror.

  • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

    Well this is going to annoy a lot of people. I hope those lost Chapters are made up ones and not forces people collect.

    Do you think those Legion of the D̶a̶m̶n̶e̶d̶ Mary Sue arrive riding lightning bolts?

    • Riding flames, dude, riding flames.

      • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

        Oh yeah, totally different. Totally. 😉

      • Haravikk

        On flaming motorcycles; they’re basically if Ghost Rider were an army of Space Marines 😀

        • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

          Thats actually quite cool. I’d buy that unit!

        • GrenAcid

          Emmm flaming motocycles are trade marked Slaanesh property, ONE AND ONLY:
          DOOOOOOOOM RIDER!
          Pls refrain from using this IP or legal actions will follow, as well as demonic invasion or two.

          • Rafał Pytlak

            DOOMRIDER! HE DOES CO-CO-COCAINE BABY!

    • Maitre Lord Ironfist

      LoD are not Marry sue, more Deus ex Machina if written bad x)

      • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

        True, I stand corrected.

    • euansmith

      I’ve always imagined that the Legion of the Damned are the Emperor’s Daemons; the first sign of his coming Godhood.

      • Sunshine Dragon

        Same and take it further and say Celestine is one of his Greater Daemons 😉

        • Blinghop

          See, I figured the LoD are the lesser daemons, Celestine is the Daemon Princess (and maybe Draigo a daemon prince too), and the Primarchs are his Greater Daemons.

          • Sunshine Dragon

            Nah, the Primarchs themselves have no tries to the warp and don’t follow that same convention. I just call them as is, Primarchs, because there’s already some on each side 🙂

            But I like this Daemon Princess idea (though Abaddon spoils it by calling her the Corpse Bride of the False Emperor -_- )

        • So grey knight would be acolytes.

          • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

            And normal Space Marines are…… Brimstones?

      • Or just the firehawks with draigo syndrome

      • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

        Yeah I think that is a given. Indicates the setting slipping grom Grim Darkness towards a High Fantasy ethos, converging with AoS.

        • UnpluggedBeta

          God, I hope this is not happening.

      • Shawn

        I agree, or at the very least, it was the best the Emperor could do to save the Fire Hawks when they disappeared in the warp. I also think there was another chapter forced into the warp to prove their loyalty to the Imperium by the inquisition, but the name escapes me at the moment.

        • The Glen

          Vorpal Swords. The Abyssal Crusade, 30 chapters went in, only the Vorpal Swords came out. They were set up by a corrupt cardinal, when they got back centuries later they shoved him (or all his trappings instead, fluff differed by source) into a boarding torpedo and shot him into the sun.

          • Shawn

            Hey, thanks Glen. I’ll look them up. Sounds like a chapter straight from D&D, lol. I’m guessing their military specialty is decapitation of the foe? 😉

    • Rafał Pytlak

      Yeah probably no names like White Consuls, Omega Legion, White Templars or other “classics”

      • euansmith

        But not the mighty Rainbow Warriors.

        • Dennis J. Pechavar

          Well obviously.

        • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

          Their Battle Barge was already sunk by the renegade Cheese Eaters chapter.

          • euansmith

            Apparently they also ran afoul of the Tau Starwhal Hunters [cetacean needed]

        • Drew_Da_Destroya

          None may bring them low

    • Evan O’Connor

      I’d not call the Stormcast mary sues, esp when they can die and come back a little bit less human every time lol.

      • EnTyme

        Shhhh. Let them keep their hatred for something others like. It helps them sleep at night.

      • UnpluggedBeta

        That’s because of nefarious nagash schemes, not a legitimate flaw in their mechanics.

    • Eh, I play lamenters, there’s a quiet dignity to playing a lost chapter

      • Dignity when you did not answered dante’s call…. 😉

        • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

          To be fair probably because they are all dead.

        • They’re dead, Jim

      • Rafał Pytlak

        Well at least they fought on the rightous side of The Badab War.

    • Anggul

      Probably not, seeing as the Stormcast Eternals aren’t Mary Sues at all if you read their lore.

  • The Custodes f … millennia the


    … those w(ho want to see?)
    the Master of Mankind dead.

    The ‘f’-word is not ‘failed’ and not ‘followed’ based on the letter we can see poking out shortly after. ‘who want to see’ nearly perfectly fits the remaining black gap.

    • Bakvrad

      Fought for millennia the secret war in the webways to stop those who want to see the master of mankind dead.

      Like this but more theatralic

      • Frostasche

        The f word here seems to be pretty short, and the next thing peeking out could be a t, maybe just the time between 30k and 40k:
        The Custodes, for ten millenia the emporer’s bodyguards/ last line of defence, most trusted …

      • Vayle

        cult mechanicus codex:
        “986999.M41
        Desperate Measures
        the tech-priest custodians at work in the emperor’s palace uncover irrevocable failures in the mechanisms of the golden throne. A dozen contingency expeditions are immediately launched, including a Xanthite war procession sent through the Exhubris Portal. The Xanthites fight through Harlequin Troupes and Daemon Hordes alike before reaching their intended destination. In the grave-cold oubliettes beneath Commorragh, a dark bargain is struck.”

        • Red_Five_Standing_By

          People always forget about this cool bit of fluff.

        • Bakvrad

          Yeah I know that one and I really really hope they continue this part 🙂

    • euansmith

      The Custodes f-word? Have they turned to Slaanesh?

      • Rafał Pytlak

        My pecks quiver with excitement little kitten

        • Dennis J. Pechavar

          I’m about to burst with enthusiasm!

          • Knight_of_Infinite_Resignation

            Just don’t pour over the rulebook, we’ve only got one and half the pages are stuck together already 😝

  • DeCold

    “the Master of Mankind dead” – well it is obviously means plastic Squats, duh.

    • petrow84

      …in Sister armor and in dedicated Thunderhawk.

      • vlad78

        plastic thunderhawk

  • Seienchin

    Well they didnt pull an Age of Sigmar but only a “half” age of Sigmar on warhammer 40k…
    The rule changes are really interesting but I think GW – again – has NO idea on where to take their IPs. 20 years no change and then a random truckload of changes in the lore that most probably make as much sense as the end times is pretty lame.

    • Luca Lacchini

      So true. Over the years they are the most glaring culprit of deus ex machina abuse. It’s effin’ everywhere, and since The Gathering Storm it got worse.

    • vlad78

      Still better than AOS by a long shot though.

      Dark imperium is an interesting read. New fluff is not as bad as the sum ups make it to be.

      • Dennis J. Pechavar

        Sadly true, also whoever has been in charge of naming the Sigmar related items clearly has been in charge of Space Wolves as well. Simarite armour made from Sigmarian metal (spelling is off but…) while the wolves have their Frost Wolf Axe wielding Thunderwolf Lord with Murder Wolf Wolf frost bolters!

        • Muninwing

          add some unnecessary murder of women and it’s got Ward written all over it…

          • Dennis J. Pechavar

            But he doesn’t hate women, it’s really good how he brought the Sisters into the plot. Right? Right?

      • UnpluggedBeta

        That’s true; AOS fluff could eventually become something interesting, but it’s orders of magnitude worse than modern 40k at the moment. There’s also the bit marring our perception where they replaced a beloved setting with a brand new one with an entirely different feel to be fair though.

  • euansmith

    “And then the Galaxy was rent in twain; sundered by an eldritch abyss. And then, from this chasm of roiling chaos, there arose the greatest threat to endanger the Imperium, ever. And then, this ultimate foe, history’s greatest monster, spake, and thus it spoke, saying, “Hi, everybody, my name’s MAAAAAAAT WAAAAAARD!!!!“”

    • ZeeLobby

      Lol. “Many predict that the central swirl of the rift covers a constellation closely resembling Matt Ward with 2 thumbs up!”

    • stinkoman

      oh man….

    • Dennis J. Pechavar

      Well we have see that the Trickster Cruddace is a big part of this.

    • Mr.Custodes

      Fun fact: ADB said Matt Ward was working on AOS during this!

      • euansmith

        That just shows how far reaching his corrupting influence is 😉

      • Dennis J. Pechavar

        I’ve read some of the fluff…it was noticeable.

  • Fergie0044

    “Mortarion and the Death Guard lead a crusade upon Ultramar only to grind to a halt at the hands of Guilliman. The two brothers faced each other in combat before the chaos forces withdrew.”

    Weren’t we going to have a global campaign about this? I mean, shocker that GW already had decided on the ending, but at least try and pretend our results matter!

    • Rafał Pytlak

      Soo… An uber powerhouse that is a daemon primarch lost a duel to Papa Smurf who even in the heresy was a medium warrior within the primarch ranks. How? Morty would probably kick his as pre-daemonlifting

    • Rafał Pytlak

      Soo… An uber powerhouse that is a daemon primarch lost a duel to Papa Smurf who even in the heresy was a medium warrior within the primarch ranks. How? Morty would probably kick his backside even pre-daemonlifting

      • Koen Diepen Van

        Yea but this is Girlyman 2.0 upgraded by Crawl tech.

        • Rafał Pytlak

          So upgrade made him maybe 20% stronger? Russ or Lion levels tops. Still Angel of Decay should win no biggie.

          • Lion El’ Jonson

            In 30k Guilliman actually wins out against Mortarion in 1v1 combat. He is really quite good as a warrior.

            And we don’t know how Guilliman wins in this new lore. I expect that he will have help in beating back the Death Lord.

      • Darth Bumbles

        Grey Knights weakening him first?
        Morty took a battering in “Mortarion’s Heart” and that was fairly “recently” plot-wise (including copping “true name” damage from Draco Ex Machina).

        • Rafał Pytlak

          I thought it was retconned as not happening? Or did GW deleted the whole “banished for xxx years to the warp” rule?

          • UnpluggedBeta

            I’d prefer them not retcon even more crap than they already have, even if it’s new crap which is retconning good crap in the past.

            It’s hard to keep track of everything.

      • Fergie0044

        It’ll only get worse. In two or three years time when we have an Angorn model there will be the mandatory story that ends with G-man beating him too. Ugh.

        • Dennis J. Pechavar

          Yes but only after his sword is knocked away. Angron stops to boast and Papa Smurf hits him with a Captain Kirk style double fist! Banished to the warp!

          • Muninwing

            now i will forever imagine Rowbot Gillyflower as the super-sized Captain Kirk.

            it actually fits fairly well, too…

          • Dennis J. Pechavar

            Read this comment in Shatner voice, ” Cato are you out of your Ultramarine mind?”

          • UnpluggedBeta

            #notMyPrimarch

          • Fergie0044

            Boasting? That’s wasting precious skull taking time!

          • Dennis J. Pechavar

            I agree but GW tends to have all their villains monologue and mustache twirl. Getting work done is not a thing.

      • Dennis J. Pechavar

        Ah but Papa Smurf has the mighty Plot Armour. Tough for him to lose with that.

      • Muninwing

        Daemon Princes get more power at certain expense… usually there’s a weak point.

        and there’s the plot armor.

        and there’s his pet deus ex mechanicum that would just rescue him if things got bad. you know it would turn out that Cawl had been working for the last 10,000 years on a special Primarch-sized anti-daemon mace that was only just finished and shipped to Ultramar just in time!

        • Dennis J. Pechavar

          It matches the Armour that he crafted…as if he knew Papa Smurf was going to need said armour… So, so dumb.

          • Muninwing

            even before he diagnosed the ailment that kept him incapacitated, he knew that he needed to make armor to fix it.

          • Dennis J. Pechavar

            PLOT ARMOUR TO THE RESCUE!

          • Graham Bartram

            ‘allo mate, Ordo Chronos here. Had a plot hole appear have we? Tearing a hole in reality is it? We can fix that for you in a jiffy. XD

    • ZeeLobby

      Lol. Well at least they let us know the results don’t matter before we waste our time.

    • UnpluggedBeta

      I remember when I was young and stupid and thought our campaigns actually mattered.

  • Camoron

    “…those who want the master of mankind dead”

  • euansmith

    “Lord Khorne has command us to dispatch 88 Legions to destroy the Palace on Terror.”

    “Only 88? We’ve got 387 Legions on stand by. Why send send so few? We could drown the the palace in Bloodletters and guarantee our victory.”

    “The only options he would entertain were “88” and “888”.”

    “You got to admit, the boss is Old Skool all the way.”

    • ZeeLobby

      Hey. He could only spend 88888 points.

      • euansmith

        “For the number of the Beast is Eighty Eight million, Eight Hundred and Eighty Eight thousand, Eight Hundred and Eighty Eight!”

        • petrow84

          Call now, toll-free with the Cicatrix Hotline!

    • Graham Bartram

      So chaotic chaos gods are OCD over certain numbers. Yup, never did get that but hey ho, GW reasons etc.. XD

      • memitchell

        Anything else would be chaos!

  • Timotheus

    “over half the Astartes Chapters are missing, with a dozen confirmed destroyed during the darkness”

    Hello Primaris… *Sigh*

    • euansmith

      I imagine that “Hello Primaris” being delivered in a jaunty, electronic voice like the old “Hello Moto” ringtone.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6OXwTqpWbs

    • memitchell

      Bigger…Better…Blueer…

    • Keith Wilson

      ahh … the reality of the GW marketing machine in full effect …. so begins the inevitable replacement of current scale marines ….. i for one welcome our new true scale overlords

      • Shawn

        I like the new marines too, but would rather keep my old marines too. I’ll continue to play them because the Iron Hands will out last them, bionics and all.

        • Ryan Miller

          Iron Hands need named characters in 40k…. 🙁

      • UnpluggedBeta

        Can we blame the new ceo over this yet? Then again, is this still from the backlog of the old ceo’s terrible decisions the new one is forced to follow?

  • Massimo D’Amato

    The italian version of the rulebook has a little print error (I don’t know if it can be found in every copy) that shows the entire text.
    It simply talks about Custodes moving from Terra after millennia to kill those that wish “to see the Maser of Mankind dead”.

    • Keegan Hume

      What’s this about a Magic laser?

      • grim_dork

        Maser is the name of the Emperor’s cat.

        • Muninwing

          but in the movie version, they used the wrong color cat, and this was a cardinal sin against fandom…

  • Barry Gregory

    Bah, it’ll be changed again in two years after people have bought all the new books and shiny stuff

    • ZeeLobby

      Then there will be a rift from North to South

  • MKG35

    We want change, the story is stagnant
    Story Changes,
    Ahhh G.W hates us they have ruined everything.
    Say most Gamers it seems

    • Darth Bumbles

      I like it, there’s a lovely sense of optimism despite the Ruinstorm and destruction. It’ll make for a juxtaposition of the grindark stories where everyone dies if every so often there’s a story where the Imperium gets a genuine win.

      • euansmith

        … and then everyone dies?

        “Hey, Roberto, we’ve got invitations to the wedding of Edmure Tully and Roslin Frey at The Twins.”

    • ZeeLobby

      Ugh. Again. No one is saying that the change in story is bad, just the way it’s written. As someone said above, Deus ex machina is just their only twist these days.

      • Muninwing

        yeah. “i want dinner” doesn’t mean i cannot be upset when you pour used bathtub water over candy wrappers and tell me to eat up.

        • ZeeLobby

          Haha. Well put!

        • UnpluggedBeta

          That is the most amazing counter to that old whine I have ever seen; I’ll be stealing your analogy good sir.

    • Rafał Pytlak

      Well they didn’t change the lore the way WE wanted it 😉

      • Muninwing

        i’m ok with changes that are well considered and well written that go in a way that i did not expect.

        i’m not ok with the fact that i’m not a professional writer, but some of the stuff that GW has released as fluff writing in their rulebooks is bad enough that i know i write better. heck, i know that many of my students write better. and some wrote better than the initial Aos fluff and at least one of the Warzone: Damocles books when they were in middle school.

        • My opinion on game fluff is that it doesn’t have to be good, but it doesn’t need to be awful either. The stuff GW is putting out lately is cringe inducing.

          • Muninwing

            i have a harsh view of fanfiction, due to being constantly exposed to the under-18 crowd of learning writers.

            that being said, i know that some amateur writers succeed more at the craft than published adults. i have read school assignments that were in snatches and flashes better than popular literature.

            the BL HH books are not mainstream, Pulitzer, intricate masterpieces. they should not have to be. they are fun, and they are better than much of the mediocre fantasy or scifi i read in my teens as a general rule.

            but the main GW fluff? it’s worse than fanfiction level because it’s about at the same level of bad but being published. someone is letting rushed semi-sensical schlock through their quality control.

            i have a pretty good estimation of my own abilities. i am not a published writer, but it’s my field. i would need time and being pushed to the extreme for me to write something like the HH books, and then i’d probably need more experience.

            professionals should be better than me. the President should be smarter than me. a published writer should be a better writer than me. any game (board, computer, or tabletop) that i play should be better than i could create. if i go to a restaurant (not a chain), the meal should be better than i could cook.

            apparently, GW does not agree with me.

          • To be fair, the market doesn’t agree with you either. Companies put out the level of quality that their customers demand. General Motors was able to make crap cars for over two decades before they finally stopped being the world’s largest automaker. GW seems to be where GM was around 2000, with some people aware that the quality of the product is poor but unable to really do anything about it. Maybe things will get better in a few years, but as long as people keep buying the schlock, there will be little incentive for GW to fix it.
            Between having dealt with military officers, judges, and corporate execs myself and hearing my wife’s experiences with doctors in the operating room, I don’t have a lot of respect for professionals anymore. They are people just like us, and if someone doesn’t hold their feet to the fire they’ll mail it in just as bad as any teenager.

          • Muninwing

            I think you’re only partly right. markets move slowly. brand loyalty (like party loyalty, or nationalism, or other mindless zealotry) needs to be overcome before people move to better options, and is one of the reasons that changes are hard to pin down causes for.

            that was a bad sentence. but i know it, and you know what i mean. and the market won’t care.

            i have respect for professionals who are professionals who are in their field. i am not a doctor, i have a doc i trust, and i respect her take on medicine more than my own or google’s. being a teacher, i know how often parents come in with no care nor understanding of why we do things how we do and want us to cater to them in a far less effective manner.

            it’s not blind trust — that is far too often abused. but remembering that 20% of people (generously) are clueless, you learn to keep a keen eye open for the telltale signs.

            automatic distrust of professionals easily becomes anti-intellectualism, which is all too often exploited by opportunists and demagogues. at least, that’s what history textbooks will probably say about this era.

          • I didn’t mean automatic distrust. Just that people are people and they have to be evaluated on a case by case basis and not on the basis of their position. GW defies my understanding of how markets work. If I ever decided to go back to school I would be tempted to write a thesis on this industry and GW in particular. What they are doing is working for them for the most part, at least for the moment. There is no arguing that.

          • Muninwing

            I do worry that their approach is more of the “short term gain long term loss” thinking that has led so much of our modern disposability and caused so many healthy industries to fail.

    • ILikeToColourRed

      some gamers: i want this to change
      other gamers: i dont want this to change
      it changes, half are still unhappy

      • Muninwing

        if the changes are halfassed, everyone is unhappy.

        • Shawn

          But half-assed changes are subjective, thus half are still unhappy, while the other half is still happy.

          On a more serious note: It surprises me what Black Library considers epic and their permissive allowance of simile and metaphor abuse.

        • ILikeToColourRed

          aye, that too

    • Keaton

      Bingo.

  • Baro Barea

    The Astropath spoken, this paragraph says that the Custodes moving from terra to kill those that wish to see the Maser of Mankind dead.

  • Inco Gnito

    This actually looks promising again.
    I am really torn apart. Some stuff has the potential to be really good and other stuff just seems sooo damn silly.
    Not sure where the scale will tip in the end but right now it has the potential to swing both ways.

    PS: Primaris Space Marines are still stupid !

    • Shawn

      I like the look of them and will get some, but I don’t think GW really needed to shoe horn them into the fluff. It would have been perfectly acceptable to simply have Cawl working on new armor, vehicles, and wargear for 10k years. Or include genetic upgrades, without creating any physical changes.

      • Ryan Miller

        Corax did it… but Alphy, or Ome got ahold of the machine and stuck his dick in it…

    • UnpluggedBeta

      The models are great, but the fluff is stupid. What is a guy who wants to get back into the game to do? non-chaos traitor legions, that’s what.
      #NotMyPrimarch

  • Are they running on Citrix XenApp at Games-Workshop? At least the writer had some experience with it: “The Cicitrix Maledictum tore the Imperium apart, and trouble came with it – as the Imperium had not seen in 10,000 years”. LOL (IT inside joke)

    • stinkoman

      Citrix Xendictum. yes it is a terrible app but it has it’s uses.

  • Ravingbantha

    The Astronomican going out would happen if the emperor died, since he was the source. But it flaring back to life makes me wonder what caused that. Did he resurrect?

    • GameOgre

      They unplugged it and plugged it back in to reset it.

      • Graham Bartram

        Not without 144 verses of Binauric Hymnal and properly consecrated Promethium m’ laddo! Oh no, not on this Tech Priests watch! Praise the machine.

  • MechBattler

    The unthinkable and the most completely awesome outcome possible has occurred – Orks and Humies working together.

    • memitchell

      Yeah. It’s like…

      “What? That’s dumb.”

      “Wait! That’s cool.”

      • Graham Bartram

        “Well to be honest Bob, we got short on DNA for the new Primaris marines ..and… well, I know they look a bit green ..but… look how BIG they are!”

        Attributed to Belisarius Cawl … ..apparently.

        • Evil Otto

          Cawl: “Lord Dante, your new Primaris marines are here.”

          Dante: “They certainly are… big. And green. Cawl, are you SURE these are Blood Angels? I mean, you didn’t mix things up by mistake, did you?”

          Cawl: “My lord, these are of purest stock. The finest geneseed of Sanguinius.”

          Primaries Marine: “Oi! You’z da boss? We’z ready ta kill, fer da Emp’rer.”

          Cawl: “See?”

          • Rafał Pytlak

            FER DA SANGI…SANGU…SUAH…FER DA BIRD BOY!

          • UnpluggedBeta

            FUND IT
            if we’re stuck with a happier, gentler imperium that bands together with xenos (and even chaos?), orks need to first on that list.

      • Rafał Pytlak

        To quote Vegeta: “He’s soo cool…but He’s soo dumb…”

    • UnpluggedBeta

      Did they retcon blood axes being obsessed over humans? I could totally see what you describe in a scenario where they still exist.

  • Golden Yak

    Enhance! Contrast! Tint! Bright! Sleep Mode! Vertical Hold!

  • Golden Yak

    Kind’ve disappointed in the outcome of the invasion of Baal. Guilliman shows up at the last minute to save the day, while also finding the time to save Ultramar from a Daemon Primarch. I thought the Cicatrix was suppose to isolate the upper galaxy and make things extra dangerous, but apparently its no barrier to Guilliman.

    Would’ve been more interesting for the Blood Angels to abandon their home system and become nomads roaming the Imperium Nihilus, raiding worlds for the supplies and recruits needed to keep themselves going.

    • Mr.Custodes

      It took 100 years and a Daemonic ritual to break through the rift.

    • Red_Five_Standing_By

      Baal happened before the Ultramar Nurgle stuff.

    • UnpluggedBeta

      I agree; there is no real consequence—yet another “we were in trouble, but then a miracle!” and back to semi-status quo.

      It’s like every cadian invasion until they “soft” destroyed the planet in a book. what the hell gw.

  • Bring it on, shake things up! The stupid story got stuck in neutral about a decad ago and hasn’t budged since. Kill whomever you have to. Just please, for the love of the emperor, bring back my stunties.

  • Rafał Pytlak

    Wonder how far Abbadon is to finally reach Terra…especially now that the fabulous Custodes are out to get him.

    • UnpluggedBeta

      he’s going to have a hell of a time getting anything done without his arms :

  • Trey

    Emperor is or at least always has been the focus of the Astronomicon if the case he is not dead, maybe mostly dead but .. well we have all seen princes bride.

    • Evil Otto

      If he’s all dead we should go through the Emperor’s pockets for loose change?

      • Trey

        Get back to you after a MLT… with really thin mutton.

  • Drpx

    Reminds me of a certain Blizzard game.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-1eC7MwqZE

  • Vayle

    “the Custodes f… (found, fought, for?) Millenia…
    … (of the, …f ine?) …. rged (charged? barged? forged?)
    … de (bide, horde?)
    …. those w (those who?)…
    the master of mankind… (dead? lead?)”

    it reminds me of this from the cult mechanicus codex:
    “986999.M41
    Desperate Measures
    the tech-priest custodians at work
    in the emperor’s palace uncover irrevocable failures in the mechanisms
    of the golden throne. A dozen contingency expeditions are immediately
    launched, including a Xanthite war procession sent through the Exhubris
    Portal. The Xanthites fight through Harlequin Troupes and Daemon Hordes
    alike before reaching their intended destination. In the grave-cold
    oubliettes beneath Commorragh, a dark bargain is struck.”

  • Nicolas M

    So… they “break the status quo” to instantly put status quo every were…

    Alright.

  • Bellumvinco

    It clearly says Those Who Wish The Master of Mankind Dead. 😉

  • UnpluggedBeta

    Jesus, gullyman is everywhere at once. What a disappointment. #notMyPrimarch