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Goatboy ‘s 40k Nonsense – Open Letter to GW Designers

4 Minute Read
Sep 5 2011

Goatboy here again with an open letter to GW’s Designers about the rumored Chaos Legions book. So without any more fanfare, trumpets, and the nice whinies of the Unicorns here we go.

Dear GW Game Designers, Dream Builders, and Internet Rage Inducers,

Hi – I hope things are well overseas. Things are going alright in the Goatdom. Grey Knights are “good” enough to be a decent choice in whatever competitive game scape we call 40k right now. The Ogre Kingdom book has a good deal of moobie action and the new models you keep coming out with are pretty dang snazzy. So good job there – but this isn’t a letter trying to puff you up and make you feel like the fanciest chicken in the yard – this is a letter about my favorite army (no matter how many times I counts-as something else) – Chaos Marines (Chaos Legions in particular).

Look I know game designing and model designing takes a lot of work. So I understand that no matter what you come out with you can’t please everyone. But lets at least look at some things this book needs to do.

1. It has to be full of flavor. For the love of Pete that last book was pretty dull. I know we can continue to bitch and complain about it but please make this new book a whole lot more interesting. New units, cool rules, and options. Dark Eldar and Grey Knights had lots of neat stuff and I think Chaos Legions could have that too. So please – make it full of flavor and something we want to eat more then just one or two bites full.

2. The Legions need Legions. I want to see the majority if not all of the legions represented. I think I might be asking too much to have everyone but we could at least have the major ones. Look at the Cult Legions to start and continue from there with one or two extra (Word Bearers please). I think that there is an option to create a extremely deep book with multiple army builds and designs all based within the Legions themselves.

3. Fix the Dreadnought. Look FW has awesome Chaos dreads. Yes the original Metal model is terrible but there are so many neat options available. I have seen some awesome conversions online and I think that this unit could be the cool lynchpin of the new Chaos codex. No it doesn’t need to be another rework of the Grey Knights dread but we could have some cool options. Super assault vehicle, marks, and crazy old weaponry.   ~Say it with me – Chaos Contemptor Dread!

4. Fix the Daemons. They need to be part of the legions – and I mean the good ones, not the generic ones. The warp needs to bleed into the game as Chaos treads on reality. These sort of things need to happen. The idea that Chaos might help the Imperium versus the Necrons is a great idea. At the base level Chaos is about freedom and emotion so I want this to be another part of the codex.

5. Polish and expand the Special Characters. They are all expensive and for the most part rubbish. These needs to get fixed as they are awesome models and need rules to help them out.  Black Library has given you guys dozens of great novels to pull villians from. Just call up Dan Abnett and I’m sure he can rattle off some good ones in a couple of minutes (make sure to have a pencil and paper handy, Dan’s a busy guy).


6. Really just make them feared again. Almost everyone has a Chaos Space Marine army somewhere. They are awesome and I really just want them to kick ass again and be a codex that inspires respect. And kick ass in a bunch of different ways. How many times have you seen 2 Lash Princes and 9 Oblits? This needs to be changed.

7. Would it be any trouble to have Phil Kelly write the book? His sideburns give him amazing codex writing powers. Plus he seems like a cool bloke and the times I have talked to him have been awesome. Plus he makes a pretty good zombie… 

8. Oh and maybe get Abaddon a new model? He is looking pretty old right now even with the Finecast treatment.

9. Maybe have Space Goats as a secret “bonus” Legion? I could always hope. ~Editor’s note: that’s it, get the cattleprod…

Finally I just want to say again thank you for making a game that has taken over my room. I know my wife isn’t always excited to hear me jabber on and on about plastic dudesmen but she at least knows I am having fun throwing dice around. So please just make a decent book with lots of cool options that make me want to paint a new CSM army (I have 3 real and 3 counts as).



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