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D&D: Five Spells To Cure What Ails You

4 Minute Read
Feb 21 2022
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The real fantasy of D&D is that you can wave your hands and get healthcare when you need it. Here are five spells to cure what ails you.

Dungeons & Dragons is a game of heroic fantasy that leans into your wildest dreams. Sometimes that means battling against fierce monsters for the fate of the world. Or it means living out more impossible fantasies, like waking up feeling rested and recharged every morning,¬†feeling like your actions actually matter, or that people other than billionaires can get ‘wealthy’.

In the world of D&D, most of us would be kobolds.

For many players, though, the biggest fantasy is ready access to healthcare. Oftentimes the cure for what ails you is just a spell or two away. You might have to rely on ‘crowdfunding’ which is basically a popularity contest, to get lifesaving medicine that’s cheaply available in other countries, but your character at least can get healed when and where they need to with these easy spells.

Lesser Restoration

Cure Wounds might be the most popular spell in the game, but the real hero is Lesser Restoration. With just a touch, a bard, cleric, druid, paladin, or ranger can end a single disease or condition (blinded, deafened, paralyzed, or poisoned) afflicting you. It doesn’t even have a material component, just verbal and somatic.

Are you afflicted with a debilitating disease? Do you just get these headaches sometimes? Lesser Restoration will fix you up. And it says any disease, so whether you’re suffering from mummy rot or fibromyalgia or even a mental illness like clinical depression, Lesser Restoration will fit the bill.

You may need multiple treatments, but each one is guaranteed to work.

Heroism

Are you too afraid to make that big change in your life? Thinking about quitting your job, but just too worried about what the future might hold?

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Heroism is the spell for you. This first level spell is usually only available to bards or paladins, but with a touch you are imbued with supernatural bravery. For up to one minute, you are utterly immune to fear, which can be plenty helpful whether you’re about to fight a dragon or demand that your boss start paying you what you’re worth. Because you, for a minute at least, have the heart of a champion.

Detect Poison and Disease

The warhammer is ABSOLUTELY how this cleric is gonna detect your poison or disease

 

Worried that you’re coming down with something? Are you just not sure what exactly is wrong with you? This spell will actually let you find out. It’s also a first level spell, and it’s more widely available.

With it a Cleric, Druid, Paladin, or Ranger can actually detect any poison or disease or poisonous creature (because sometimes what’s wrong with you is being infested with toxic slaad eggs). Imagine, only having to see one practitioner for a full and complete diagnosis.

Sleep

Tired of lying awake restless all night? Another first level spell available to pretty much everyone will put you out like a light. With no harmful side effects either! A simple sleep spell will calm you down faster than any meditation, app, or sketchily marketed supplement, all you have to do is not have too many hit points.

Silence

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Does the world seem a little overwhelming sometime? Could you use a break from the daily grind? Silence might be the perfect answer. Sure it’s a 2nd level spell, but for up to ten minutes this spell will buy you an escape from the world. Cast it around yourself and the pressures and noise of the world will just melt away.

What spells could YOU use in real life right now?

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