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D&D By The Numbers: The Perfect Rogue

4 Minute Read
Apr 21 2020
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Rogues are the class you can depend on when you need someone skilled. We’re going to run the numbers and cook up the iconic Rogue.

You might say that perfection is a dream. That the best we can hope for is to see the shadows on the wall that hint at the actual thing, while the sunlight awaits us. Can we ever truly see beyond the cave of our perceptions and find anything truly objective? Well, if you listen to people who put their trust in computers, then yes. We can look at the aggregate choices that people make and from them, determine the most idealized version of whatever it is we’re looking at. Because obviously whatever is the most popular is the best one, otherwise why would people pick it?

With that in mind, we’re going to let the numbers do their terrible work, and from them finally get at the perfect Rogue.

Clearly the answer is vests and cool jackets. I don’t know what else top expect. Well here’s how people are playing their scoundrels in well-accessorized outfits.

Although I suppose we should look at what goes into the perfect Rogue and also Fighter, because if you’re playing a Rogue there are fifty-fifty odds you’re playing a multiclass Rogue/Fighter (though you could also be a Fighter/Rogue). Rogues are among the leastbe multiclassed–and even that’s still a 50% chance. Like we said before, everyone is multiclassed these days.

And if you’re a Rogue, odds are you’re also an assassin. Fighter makes a lot of sense in that light. Features like fighting style and a d20 hit dice help beef up the rogue’s attack–and Action Surge basically gives you an extra chance to land a crucial sneak attack.  Especially since it lets you set up the attack, ready an action, attack again combo that gives rogues multiple sneak attacks in the same round. And all that on top of the Assassin’s abilities make for a deadly damage dealer.

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Duelist or two weapon fighting are both probably good go to options for the discerning rogue, granting either extra one handed damage or better second attack options. Now, if we look at the level range, we can say that the perfect(ly average) rogue is probably 3rd or 5th level, so let’s say 3 levels Rogue, two levels Fighter.

Now this particular rogue doesn’t have spells–though if this was an Arcane Trickster spell choice is pretty easy, Mage Hand and then whatever else you want–but we do have a few more choices to make. Most notably, gear. Our perfect rogue is probably wearing leather armor, according to this chart:

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Though as a multiclassed character this rogue is technically able to wear heavier armor like chain mail, it’s better overall to just rely on Dexterity to get what we need done. That way we can wield a weapon that’s finessable, like… a dagger. Or maybe twenty daggers given the numbers:

Now all we have to do is figure out how our stats break down. As mentioned before, Dexterity is king here, and the numbers agree with us:

Nearly 45% of all rogues have a maxed out Dex and the ones that don’t are probably using a racial bonus to bump from 14 to 16 and putting their 15 in Charisma maybe. Looking at this spread, our rogue has a Dex of 15, a Charisma of 14, a an Intelligence of 13, a Con of 12, Wisdom of 10, and a Strength of 8, with the 3rd, 4th, and 5th stats all jockeying for position depending. One last thing, if we’re playing with feats, we might be Rogue 4, Fighter 1–just getting started. But if that’s the case we might have a feat, which most likely is…

Alert. So there you go folks, the Perfect Rogue.

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Happy Adventuring!

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Author: J.R. Zambrano
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