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Warhammer 40K Hot Mess – Ork Stompa

4 Minute Read
May 31 2022

Let’s take a deep dive into a hot mess of a 40K unit and some thoughts in how we can fix them up. Boy, how bad is the Ork Stompa?  Pretty bad.

Do you remember when the Stompa came out?  And how Cheap it was?  Well I do as a I had a year where I got one in a trade for painting services and then proceeded to win 2 more in local events.  That’s right I got 3 Stompas in a year.  I ended up trading them out and still somehow I have one big red one (primed red) sitting in the house where my youngest son keeps asking about the red robot.  I can’t even start painting it because the Ork Stompa is just bad.  It doesn’t do enough for a rather inflated cost.  There is a video of a game where my poor Stompa I played died to lasguns.  A crap ton of flashlights lit up his gross belly and took that chunky robot out.

Ork Stompa Basics

This is the one of the first Lords of War and its more like a Orky Prince of Trash.  It is big, has some ok guns, and a ton of wounds. What it doesn’t do is affect the battlefield a lot.  Sure it helps out the Orks with an Effigy or Gork or Mork but it should just do a heck of a lot more.  It shouldn’t be an expensive but bad Imperial Knight.  It needs to be a true Stompa of War!

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How to Make the Stompa good?

Will start with the basics.  We need to make him a heck of a lot tougher.  I don’t think we throw it more wounds.  Instead we think of ways to make it tougher.  Like let’s call one of its rules – “Lord of Scrap” where it takes 2 less Damage (maximum 1) from attacks. Make damage 1 attacks give it a +1 to its armor save. Then say any unsaved wounds can cause a Mortal wound back on the attacker (say on a 6) in close combat due to metal scraps falling off of it.

Amp Up His Guns (because right now they dull)

Let’s do something where every gun that hits, grants the next gun gets a better AP.  Will call the ability “Fists of Gork” because they are wrecking the armor of the enemy with a constant barrage of bullets.  This way the player can try to set up some interesting combos and utilize things like his Big Shootas to soften em up a bit for the big round house punch.

Get Those Close Combat Attacks Better!

This guy needs to do some type of tiny feet like stomp attacks. His close combat weapon attack, plus some of his “fixers” who hang up top all need to attack.  the Ork Stompa needs to rumble in and just cause a ton of damage. It should feel like an avalanche of Ork nonsense as it finally trundles in.  When it finnaly comes in you need to be scared because it is going to smush anyone in its way.

Make the Ork Stompa a True Effigy!

This guy needs to be a true monument to Orkiness!  It needs to give off an Aura of extra attacks, strength, exploding 6’s, and other things.  Heck make it part of an upgrade tree as you could add different things to him to make it useful, as the WAAAGH increases around it. Let it become a true centerpiece of an army with benefits that radiate off of him as the WAAAGH energy flows across the table top. 

Just Make Him Cool!

Do you remember the old Deff Rolla Stompa that was around awhile ago?  Do you remember all the weird things it could do like the Lifta Droppa and other stuff?  Just bring some of those cool things back.  I don’t want to see 3 in an Army but seeing one better make me rethink my plans into dealing with it.  It needs to be tough, mean, and just a pain in the butt to take down.  It is such a ridiculous model that it just needs to be worthy of Gork and Mork!

Let us know how you would fix the unit, down in the comments! 

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